America's Next Top Model-- Cycle 14, Episode 2

[marlenanke]

So.

America's Next Top Model.

Yes, I have watched every single cycle released. DON'T JUDGE ME!

Right. Moving on.

Hmm. I might have ANTM episode summary updates critique thingy as a regular feature. Maybe. We'll see. I'm not good with promises. (By the way, I'm writing this kind of from memory. Yeah.)

Anyway.

The title of the episode alone, as in so many other cases, leaves me O.o until they go ahead and explain it. Then it's facepalm from there.

But that's just me.

Previously, on ANTM, we were left hanging with no actual photo shoot occurring. Or elimination. They had make-overs, though, which is something, I guess. Perhaps they were getting whiplash from the catastrophic hair some of the girls seem to sport every cycle. Moreover, I was skeptical about whether they were planning on leaving every episode with a cliffhanger or something. Turned out I shouldn't have worried since it's yet another 90-minute special. OK then.

I don't get it. I really don't. It's been going on for 13 cycles already, but I swear these girls are never going to get. Do they not listen at all? Do they not watch the shows? What the hell is wrong with them? Especially the ones who seem to watch it so much always end up kind of... meh.

Of course there's a nude photo shoot. There's always one in there somewhere, but I give ANTM props for never making it icky. Alasia can bring the ick-factor all by herself. She needs to go. Seriously. And what is up with André Leon Talley liking her and wanting to hang her picture in his salon? WTF? Dude, weirdness.

And of course they boot Gabrielle. Blah. Bad, bad choice. I know they want drama, but they have enough of that without needing to keep Alasia on. Double-blah. Oh, and Jessica, the token conservative Christian girl, wins. Go figure!

Apparently, even more drama abounds since Naduah is lying her arse off about her entire life is seems. Whatever. I've had enough of the bald girls on this show. I want Ren to win because she is awesome, although, realistically, it's probably going to be the girl with the awesome face. The one with the eyebrows. What was her name? Something-something. I'll look it up later. Reina. Or it might be Krista because they seem to like her. Or Jessica because they like her, too. I do love Reina's look, but Ren has this incredible attitude that I feel is missing from the rest of the contestants--chilled and cool. None of the girls are truly cool like that. Plus, she has tattoos and a great face for off-beat modeling.

So, yeah: Naduah's lying. Whatevs. Ren dislikes the noise and stupidity in the house (surprise, surprise!). Alasia needs to go badly.

Watching and Miss J. is, thankfully, back. I feel like Talley is talking too much on panel, but what can you do? The fashion show is quite imaginative what with the pendulum props and all. Brenda really is stunning, and WTF is that, Alexandra?!? That was weird in many, many, many ways. It will be an ANTM classic moment in years to come for sure. Brenda wins, so yay. Jessica gets to take a prize as well because of this new thing they've introduced where the girl who gets top photo one week gets a prize in the challenge in the next week regardless of how well they do. I'm wondering how this will work if the girls who wins the challenge had first photo the week before anyway and whether this will make the girls have less incentive to win the challenges (like, do well enough to not be in danger of elimination, but bad enough that they don't have to put in that extra effort for the prize). Um, yeah.

Ren vs. Alasia. Alasia needs to go because she is insane.

Next photo shoot is kind of awesome. I always dig the shoots. I don't get how some girls don't get it. How do they even think about competing on ANTM when they know they suck at taking pictures? Blah. Ren is lame because she should have removed her contacts seriously.

I was so sure they would cut Ren. but I think they're trying to be alternative or something this cycle (just look at the make-over photo shoot pictures, WTF they're awesome!) because they had a pierced and tattooed girl in the semi-finals and then they took Ren up. So Ren stays probably just because of that. Perhaps also because the producers (possibly) realised that maybe Naduah is lying about more than just Playboy offering to do a spread on her. I don't know. I don't really care. She's out, which is unexpected for ANTM's politically correct standards (or something), but it makes me happy, so yay.

Ren stays, so yay. And Reina gets best picture. It's a incredible picture, so yay again.

Uh. They need to make it more interesting with the photo shoots methinks. I mean, they're still interesting, but I feel that there's such a formula to them all. They need to get all alternative about it. Do something new and completely unexpected, but still connected with modeling. Maybe new locations and new designers and new photographers. I don't know.

Overall, I can't wait for the regularly-timed episodes. The specials are killing me.

Next week there's something with dancing and stuff. Yeah, OK. Whatevs.

Comments? Complaints? Corrections? Feedback is appreciated!